Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
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