Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
I woke up to a huge bag of McDonalds breakfast, a cup of coffe and Advil. The note read "yeah its a one night thing, but I felt bad so here you go. Thanks"
He just set a new unobtainable standard in one night stand etiquette.
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
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