you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
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