We fish bowled my car and anna told us a story about time travel and part of it had people melted into the side of a boat and i imagined them being melted into my car moaning in pain and then we got scared and thought zombies were outside and couldn't leave for a while.
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
Randomize