I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
I deleted his number so I had to go into my old voicemails which are saved through my gmail and search his name... Never underestimate the resourcefulness of a drunk girl on a mission for dick
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
Randomize
