when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
Fyi I let myself into your place, I'm wearing some of your clothes in your bed. Come take them off
I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
Randomize
