She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
honey bunches of taint.
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
ETA 20 minutes and if you greet me at the door with a gin & tonic I’ll give you head.
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
Randomize