is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
Randomize
