I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
My six-margarita-deep ass just used a blow torch to light the match that lit my bong pack. Peak single 🤦ðŸ¼â€â™€ï¸
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
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