Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
I have feelings that need drinking.
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize
