Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
Randomize
