Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
Randomize
