I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
You're earring is so big in my mouth
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
Randomize
