Dual....:-)
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
I seriously don't understand how you keep getting laid.
Because I'm like the spider of false hope. I spin elaborate tales and snare them in my web of utter disappointment. They soon realize their mistake, but by then it's too late.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
It was a blind-side dick pic.
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
Randomize
