Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
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