There was a fist fight in my basement last night at four in the morning, in case you were wondering
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
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