if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
I was taking a bath while he walked in, sat down on the toilet, and said "its like a baby, I can see it crowning."
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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