Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
Last night was just one giant freudian slip.
You made out with EVERYBODY.
Can I just bleach my life?
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
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