plans for tonight: dress up like pirates, drink a bottle of mad dog and watch the sorostitues across the street get naked. and yes, the mad dog part is already in play. hurry the fuck up. i look like a loser doing this alone.
so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
Randomize
