So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
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