you were crying and the really sympathetic homeless man offered you a sip of his whiskey. who was i to stop you?
i will never coherently bang her
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
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