real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
wake up i wanna do it froggy style
It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
Randomize
