fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
Randomize
