I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
Randomize
