I am in a vortex of obligation.
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
We were drunk waiting for tacos and I gave him a handy in the back of the Uber while giving the driver relationship advice. I think I'm handling the whole grad school thing alright.
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
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