She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
my dad is drunk dialing our relatives who are stuck in a blizzard asking them to pick up sun tan lotion for him cause hes too drunk to drive to the store.
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
Randomize
