We got so high we made milksteak
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
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