Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
Randomize
