don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
Like, you've got the smoothest dick in the west. Do you moisturize?
Yes I do
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
Randomize