Just woke up in bed, AC on high, with a fresh pack of smokes, an unopened pint of vodka, and a bag w a beef patty w cheese in it. I think my roommate's like the toothfairy or something. Or that was way more Xanax than I needed.
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
Alive...but barely. Had dinner with my parents tonight which was conveniently located near where i left my car, phone, and self respect
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
There are flour footprints all over the house. Either u guys are trying to pull that Paranormal Activity shit on me again, or u got drunk and tried to make pancakes.
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
Randomize
