i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
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