Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
Randomize
