I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
I got propositioned while wearing the bottom half of a horse costume. It's like god is apologizing to me in the strangest of ways.
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
He picked me up in Smart Car with the license plate “MYWHIP.” I think my ovaries shriveled up and died.
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
Randomize