Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
He brought a TOOTHBRUSH and TOOTHPASTE with us on our date..... I want to go home and forget I ever decided to be nice and go on this date in the first place...... A TOOTHBRUSH!?!?!
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
Randomize
