I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
Randomize