Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(208): View more from Idaho

i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.

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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.

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(541): View more from Oregon

I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?

(815): View more from Illinois

Quite the contrary. Sophistication.

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(602): View more from Arizona

I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?

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(980): View more from North Carolina

when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.

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(918): View more from Oklahoma

He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.

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(978): View more from Massachusetts

How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night

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(310): View more from California

NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT

(310): View more from California

NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS

(310): View more from California

NOTHING

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(+61): View more from Australia

we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...

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