I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
My legs feel like baby dolphins
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Marry her
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
Randomize
