I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
she looked like the before picture.
you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
Randomize
