Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
I had to put my glasses on last night to watch porn. SO getting lasik with my tax returns this year.
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
Randomize
