Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
Randomize
