just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
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