Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
Randomize
