If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Randomize
