she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
We invented "Diesel Bombs." They're supposed to be a bomb, but they come in a 20+ oz. glass and have a blackout record of 6 wins and 0 losses. Undoubtedly going to be the next Muhammed Ali of the drinking world.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
I have peed in a lot of sinks
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
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