Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
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