we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
Mom wants to know why I'm bringing a blender back to college.... didn't have the heart to tell her she's paying a $20,000 tuition for us to make margaritas and sleep through class
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
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