Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
Britney fell asleep on the couch in the foier, got up stripped then pissed on the floor. Then got dressed and went to sleep in it. Also downstairs toilet clogged. Not me. I will be gone by the time you get home from work. Have fun.
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
we tried to pick out bridesmaid dresses with pockets so we could sneak flasks in with us. what the fuck is the point of a dry wedding?
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
We can't go out this weekend. My uterus is so desperate it's given me permanent beer goggles
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Randomize
