Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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