Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
I woke up with my keys safelty pinned to my thong. It's gonna be a great day.
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
I don't care that you had sex on my bed. I care that you used my lollipop condom. I was saving that for a special occasion
It was a special occasion. Your best friend had crazy awesome sex on your bed. Thank you
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
Randomize
