super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
And then he peed in my hair
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