Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
Well, I made it all the way to the gas station. And from there, I begged a cab driver who was parked outside, to give me a piggy back ride the final 2 blocks to my apartment. I wasn't in the cab. Didn't have to pay. Drunk me is smart, and very lazy.
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
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